Another problem with marriage counseling is that it unnecessarily demands that both parties get in touch with their feelings.

Unfortunately, marriage counselors sometimes advise spouses to separate into individual sessions when they really want to work on their marriage. But individual counseling is NOT a prerequisite for marital work!

Our society has become very consumer oriented. Unfortunately, this consumer mentality has seeped into marriage counseling. But deciding about your marriage is NOT akin to a purchasing decision. Relationships and family values do NOT lend themselves to charts listing pros and cons. That would be like trying to grasp an idea with your hand; it’s the wrong approach. And it won’t work.

The other thing worth noting about this cost-benefit approach which is typical amongst “neutral” therapists (by now you can see that they’re not really neutral) is that it “favors” the more self-oriented spouse. But in a troubled marriage, it’s that selfishness that needs to be tamed not freed.

Read more about Patricia Jenkins MSW and what else can help to your children or friends event to your self.